It's all about love ...

"He walked into my life and held my hand
A promise untold but surely it showed,
The happiness you shower on my life
Wish it would be there for all my lives- love u"

Life's untwisted turns- yes I stand strong to this..Love at first sight- dunno if I can call this but it was definitely love all the way. At the very beginning I knew this was my MAN and ever since I have been the happiest. Ours is not a all-sweet relationship with me being a boiling pot all the time, we have this numerous arguments but then we know we are simply inseparable. Life has not been the same, yes I did not know love can do this to you...but I long for him every moment, his smile is all it takes to make me happy..our journey has started, our dreams are still being crafted but yes its one dream, its one soul that we share..the bonding between us is God's greatest gift to me after my family.

I know I say this always but yes I simply love you. You have been my biggest strength from the time we have met, you are the essence of my life..Let the Almighty bless us so that our relationship grows with the passing time, may we stand strong holding each other's hands against all the barries we may face in life, let us bind together and rise....

"The bond that we share,
The warmth, the love, the care,
Let the Almighty bless thy souls
As we walk together, AMEN"

The IIM-A....

"Heard about it and aspired to be there
Work I put in was not enough to lead me there,
The institution being the best will not invite me there
Dreams will have to fade now that my success won't be there"

IIM-A - this institution which holds a hell lot of importance to all of us who wanna make it big in the world, who wanna achieve what not many wud be able to..well for me any of A,B,C would not have made a great difference but yes totally agree that the effort I had put in is not at all commendable, forget about it leading me there..why i am writing this blog, well I am getting to hear a lot about it from my friend, yes I am not only immune to his non-stop chatter but have always enjoyed it as well, sorry "always" would be too polite , "often" might be more appropriate..

If you notice most of my blogs tend to be more about something which keeps tickling in my mind and this time again i prefer not to be different. Everything good being done in this institutes is known to most of us- disciplined and a very impressive infrastructure, i too had this opinion but then when i got to know more about it and terms like "discrimination" come into the fore that you tend to sit and realize that eventually its "INDIA" where out of sheer care we tend to make people we like, handicapped by our favours, favouritism will make us overlook the capabilities that our so called "dear" one might possess.yes so here as well we have everybody favouring the IITians and then the NITians and then the rest..well logic would be that these people are more capable , well they could be but if they are let them sweat it out with the rest, give them a chance to prove that they are indeed a class apart..just like every fresher there had been advised not to bask in the glory of their past laurels, let them leave their baggage of past success,join in with the rest and then let the race begin..

"Race, race as you want to leave a trace
Face, face thy fruits of labour raised,
Cherish, cherish thy sucess that you have now reaped
Best, best you indeed are until thy not accept defeat"

The journey continues..

"Life and its amazing flow
Thy tide will make me grow,
Take me to a land I never know
Memories strong I hold tight forever though"

My first blog said it once and I believed in it always - "unexpected twists and turns in life", just when you think life's settled and it won't surprise you any more, there it goes bang into you and the jerk is such that you can simply watch and see what else it takes you through..
I was settled in Bangalore very much, it wasn't that I dint expect more from life , it was just that I was contented with what had been happening-friends, work..yes it wasn't as if everything was fine at work but it wasn't smthing that I cudn't cope with..HE has always given me everything just at the time HE thinks I need it the most, so frankly speaking when I decided to switch to a new company I was thinking the wait is gonna be long like its been for everything else I have achieved in life..
The interviews were done and I accepted the job and was thrilled and excited about it.Yes i was leaving Bangalore, so big deal..how was I to know that it would indeed be a tough deal and its been like that ever since then..this place which I initially was scared of stepping into had given me some great moments in life,I would definitely not rate all as happy times but yes times which I would hold tight throughout..times which made me smile at my innocence, times which made me proud of my presence, times which made me sit and be observant, times which made me weep at my negligence and the list goes on..
Hyderabad- everything here seems to be mean and rude to me, the comparisons I would never stop with what I had in my previous abode, I love my house and my room-mates are nice, the people in my office are friendly as well, so I am left thinking the absence of what is making my life here seem miserable..maybe i was being skeptical about this place much before being here, maybe I had made up my mind that this place would not give me what Bangalore has..can i call this addiction but addiction to a place, seems weird, right?? but why do you forget, I had mentioned it in the beginning of this blog and i end with that note - Nothing is as unpredictable as "LIFE"...

"I wander through this land
Life here seems to be bare and bland,
I search your soul to hold thy hand
And cherish the warmth of your land"

Hurt...very hurt...

"Painful it is, Hurt I am
Destiny is harsh I know now;
God is there I thought always
My faith in HIM needs an answer to stand strong now"

Vanished it did much before I could even realize, yes Hurt I am , hold myself completely responsible for it..I m feeling bad about having to lose a frendship which cud have been for a lifetime..when will i stop expecting btw what did i ask for this time , God yes u need to tell me now..there has to be a stop..either u tell me what's my fault or u don't make me go thru all these..I was not in love or smthing but i cudn't have lied to ma and no I won't blame her, why shud I , dint she do whatever any other mom wud have..she's not to be blamed if she's got a daughter who some body thinks is not gud at all..no my self-esteem , my confidence has got a blow, hate to accept it..but i can't let it out this time..i m depressed because I thought i knew my frend, i can understand the pressures but why lemme be hurt..i wasn't even given a chance to ask a question but that's fine, wudn't like to blame him becoz he's been very honest from the very first day we got to know each other..well curse the fate which let us meet again after so many years, i dint ask for it..yes i get emotional very soon but I can't help it..i just know for once I m very hurt........i hate to see tears flowing down my eyes but i can't cry, I can't bear to see that mom wud feel bad..i can't bear to answer anybody for what happened..please come back..please can we be frendz again...I know stupid of me to think that u wud be reading this...

Cherish THE frendship......

"Difficult times those are when I desperately need a friend
And to be then with me you have made a trend,
Our frendship I assumed wud never happen
Glad I am now that our frenship has not since dampened;
U are there with me but not near
Not that I not shed a tear,
I know to you I m very dear
In life's all turns I shall be there, dear..."

PUBS- the in-thing in this place called B'lore (Namma B'lore Rocks...love u ...) , both me n my roomie cum frend (well love to call her a frend, roomie is not the way I wud like to refer her ..) were really excited about trying out these places but wanted to make sure we've the right company to go there..He comes to give his interview here, not that I m very close to him infact have never spoken to him earlier but then thought wud go with these 2 guys ,hey hold on if u think i went to party with 2 complete strangers, they were my frendz' gud pals so saw no reason why I shud refuse..Purple Haze- heard of this place, was told this is the best pub in B'lore..the guys wud definitely agree , both of them simply loved the music , both of us enjoyed as well, dint we ;)..gulped down all that i cud lay my hands on , tried everything I always wanted to try once but yes me, mighty as I m was not bowled over by any..yes right, dont think nething was interesting enuff there for me to make it a habit..but then this blog's not been written to describe all of this , this effort has been laid to bring forth the initial setup required to describe a relationship called "FRENDZ, nahhh..BEST FRENDZ :))"...is somebody listening there??

"U know what, he did this at work today..she told me this, how sweet, right??....they shudn't have done it..."etc..etc..none of u except one can know what I m referring to, right sir listening?? its strange the way we became frendz but simply love the way things happened between the 2 of us, my non-stop chatter over the phone, our discussions on the topics we think are very imporatant in life, both of us speaking our hearts out and then laugh away at our own stupidities..wow.. and at the end of the month me cribbing about my phone bill has also become a habit now, I m just waiting for u to finish off ur studies and then I get every penny back with interest, right.(huh..wish I had been this careful about money though..but aren't these the reasons for us to keep smiling even when not everything around's right..so why bother man??)what times they are , nothing much I can say now, dunno why but can't seem to get the right words to express..just know that u'll be always there for me, well can't say that abt myself though, u know how much my mind flickers, right dear??

"In life there are those wonderful occasions
Where we meet some of HIS awesome creations,
You, one of them is a cherished possession
Hope dear u reach ur final destination ;)"

Work- 8.5/5

"I come here and a lot I see
Different people they all be,
Don't know if I have it in me
Success is all I wanna see;
Work is all I thought it would be
Never thought there wud be frendz here for me,
Help and knowledge they give a lot to me
People around is what unites it to me"

I have always maintained this and I still do-this organization has some of the best people I have met in my lifespan of these years (stupid if u think u wud get me to disclose my age..) I used to hate the place when I first came here, what?? an outbound?? why did they have to organize this-jobless people..I can never mingle with people I have met for hardly 2-3 days, forget about having to spend entire 3 days with them..glad I got somebody who feels the same way as I do, so we both stayed away..(only now I realize how snobbish we must have appeared then to the rest and dont think will ever be able to forget it coz my dear frend wud lose no opprotunity to remind me of it..)even God cudn't bear our attitude ne more I guess, so our 3-days outbpund was cut short to 1 and a half day..i m thrilled and so is she.. ma n papa had to leave that very day, was i sad? yes i was inspite of been in the hostel for 4 years i guess i still miss them always..and i can never see tears in ma's eyes, they always bring tears in mine...

Since 8th august a lot of events flowed - my trainings in mainframe, yes that was one awesome team-very energetic and smart as well,sharp contrast to my team then-very subdued though very focussed as well, yes that's what i call people who wud remain glued to their monitors, it wud take u some effort to see them smile, i said smile ok not laugh..did they know to spell "laugh"? but then see the word “then”.. my battle to get my team changed and those endless sleepless nights thinking about whr my career was heading towards? but then times changed, decided to see my work the way they wanted me to see, it was not all that black but how a single star in a black sky can't light up the world for long is a matter of great debate, what say, wanna start ;)

And then I decided to work, yes I did work ok..i started liking what I was doing, yes like scripting , just love to explore the functionality and then see ur scripts do it for u, still can remember how “datatype” was added in my application-the first script I wrote for this place..but then some few scripts followed and then the execution series, yes used to love it , found it challenging as well for a while but then a true Gemini I am , need to see things changing which hasn’t been happening always but at times I do think the organization doesn’t work for me , I work for it..so maybe I’ll have to find out avenues to learn and improve and not rely on it to teach me , right? And then my first award , was this better than ur first salary, yes it was inspite of no cash with it..come on everybody got their salary damn it but the award was for a few..u might call me a kid, come on its just a small award , so what ?? hopefully I wudn’t stop with it, so watch out here I come..

“Through years I spend I wanna learn
In knowledge always I wanna earn,
With everyone here I have lot of fun
I want the show to always run”

As-if a frend...

"The first day U said "hi"
I dint bother to reply,
I thought no matter how much we try
Our frendship wud never ply;
Wrong I was and glad I am
Through destiny that we met surprised I am,
Frend, I need u to be always true
A lot I care for u and will always do"

so there back to blogging again , cudn't have missed this one person who I've known since some months and like i always tell him, "How well do I know u??", no maybe I do , maybe I don't, just wanna say no matter how u r , i like the way u r with me..very true, netime i think of u this is the only word that i can think of now (yes i know before this the word was decent, that's why i say "now"..dont ask me what's coming up next ok??) , somebody whom i trust so much , since i know u won't be reading this i think i can say, or infact i wanna confess that i have not always thought very well of u initially and i somehow dint always think u were the person to be relied on..i always wanted to maintain a distance from u , thought wud make all efforts to make sure don't get close to u..but no i wud have been away from "the little priviledges in life" had i done so..
yes i forgot raksha bandhan but ok i still remember how much u cribbed abt it and infact still do..yeah right, u are the brother i have always wished for..u don't act that ways though ne time, u think u are very matured, yes i hate to accept it - u r sensible but i still like the times when u behave like a kid..still can't forget how much u kept on yelling at me to give tips on impressing a girl, idiot..u don't need tips, u r a charmer, yes i think u had used it for me once when u spoke about me to some frend, right? but lemme tell u, it also applies to u..one of the most handsome guys i have ever seen, somebody whom i like lots..getting so used to u now , fighting with u everyday, our arguments on that one topic (yes disgusting that's what i feel abt that topic..) , my cribbing about u not giving me time..honestly speaking don't wanna tie u to my expectations coz i know u do every effort to fulfil expectations of many others , so somwhow wanna let u free and do things u wanna do..there are many people who care for u, dunno if i make a difference to u, i know u will get offended at me for saying this but want u to say that more often...love u lots.............

"A lot in u I have to confide
Dunno if it will change the flow of the tide,
Knowing u, U'll still hold tight
But make sure U teach me the right;
Fate of life U can never say
Dunno if tomorrow will be gay,
Wish u a life full of happiness and gay
Prayers for u I will always say"

U've got mail..

"Stranger I think you are,
Very different from me you are
No matter how true you are,
Rules of destiny they are"

Heard people making frendz thru chatting and always found it weird coz suspicious Gemini I am, find it difficult to trust people with whom I have been thru ages and this person is a total surprise package for me..The last I remember of him before we started exchanging mails is hmmm..lemme think..hmmm..hmmmm..think hard...yeah thinking....hmmm..nothing.Hey come on, I hardly remember how I looked when i was in 3rd standard ok so spare me if I can't recall my classmate and esp that classmate whom I guess I ever spoke to, yes we hardly spoke to guys then , find it funny though now , was I a female superiority preacher as a kid and hated all mcps, dunno..bullshit..u think i cud think so much as a kid but yes u never know...One fine day through orkut (that reminds me for once I think I shud be grateful to my company gateway to restrict access to this site or else i wudn't have been bloggin now, can I hear my computer keys yelling at me and my mouse heaving a sign of relief...never mind..who cares...), I get this mail and i read it twice (yes honestly!!) and I am surprised to see his name "can we be frendz again?" well when were we frendz then?? never mind I say , hey wait the last I remember of him was that he was the most decent guy and the most studious guy then in my class..And then the strings of mails flow and they keep on flowing till date , dunno where I am heading to, dunno and very confused, just know need to make my parents happy and happy they will be if it happens, think he feels the same way but u can never say coz we always see the river flowing in the direction we want it to flow, well if u don't agree to this I dunno but this is what a true optimist like me feels..so let's wait and watch and won't lie , keeping my fingers crossed..

"I dunno if I feel any think for u
Just wanted to say U r too gud to be true,
To make the first move I say I want it to be u
Together we should make our walk through life turn true"

r u listening??

"I lay my first step and see u r thr
To make sure the world won't scare,
Through all these years when I look back and stare
Not a time I could see when u weren't thr;
All the hurdles in life I feared to bear
U made sure U teach me to dare,
In ur eyes I could see how much U care
Thanks a lot for always being thr"

yeah right, so they r supposed to do it, right..yups that's what many say but is it easy? when u have to miss things in life u want to do becoz ur daughter has a test tomorrow and she wudn't study a word without u being there, this is just one instance, endless are the days when i have seen u put down things becoz of me..thanks , that word says it all but how many times have i told u that?? such busy we r, yes that's the excuse i put up always huh..do i lose an opportunity to show my gratitude to a frend, do i forget to say a thanks to the rick-driver who drops me to work, then why haven't i said it to u, aren't u more important ..oh yes i need to correct myself, u r the most important for me, i have never said it but trust me i have always felt it, not because of the things u do but because of the endless ways u show how much u love me..

won't say haven't done things for u though but yes agreed no comparison to ur affection..can't forget how much still i miss having the apron on me and the sthethoscope around my neck but then maybe i m better-off as an engineer but...

life with its small surprises..yes do i need to compromise on this..but why shud i think it of that way, aren't u both happy with it? so sorry i wud reframe it as smthing u want me to do and smthing which i wud like to do becoz that makes u proud and happy of me..that's the best way i can rephrase it, hope that sounds better though..

"Endless years of life I sit here and see
Its gonna be hard but I think I have it in me,
U be there and never leave me
In life U make all the difference to me"